Imagine this - It’s 2024, February 21. For 2 years Ireland has been battling invading forces from Britain who claim they are attacking us to stop us from going full in to wipe out a large ethnic group who are agitating for self-rule in 3 nothern counties and the right to speak their own language, oh, and to have their church linked up with the Anglican hierarchy in England. Already a decade long, there have been atrocities committed on both sides, but now Ireland is fighting to stay alive.
Imagine this - The USA, EU, Canada, Australia, New Zealand and a couple of others are backing us with weapons. Not enough, never enough, but we’re getting them. There have been negotiations but our Taoiseach has stood firm and rallied ‘the world’ to our side. We’re fighting, but we all know it’s a matter of time before we have to stay at the negotiation table.
Imagine this - The USA and a couple of EU countries help us with cash and we’ve hired in lots of mercenaries. Two years on and we’ve lost quite a few, some have been caught selling weapons to the Brits, while others have simply gone home. France recently said they’ll send in troops, but we already have a load of Poles and they’ve been wiped out regularly. We’ve asked to join NATO but they’re not keen to have us, not yet anyway.
Imagine this - February 22, 2024, one of our leading insiders, of Irish heritage, in Washington has just been booted or resigned or God knows what. But she’s just visited Dublin unexpectedly and had a jamming session with Bono, who mostly resides in America. She tells us that Boris Johnson, that dastardly chameleon who seems more teflon than a new frying pan, is in for some nasty surprises. She said it in Dublin now she’s said it in Washington. But she’s gone, so hope for us ordinaries is gone too.
Imagine this - March 22, 2024, what in the name of Jaysus was that. I mean, I hate the Brits for what they’ve done to my country for a century or so, but they don’t deserve what just happened in London. Some madmen, or women, went into the Hammersmith Apollo, shot it up and burned it down. Well, not down fully, but you get me. Madness. Lots of people are laughing about it here, but it feels odd. Let’s follow what the Yanks say.
Imagine this - March 22, 2024, people are still bleeding out in London and a spokesperson in Washington says it wasn’t Ireland or Irish people involved, it was probably some Islamic group. Worse, they say it shows that people aren’t happy with Johnson and that there’s discord over there. I mean, the horrific vids bring it home that it was probably those Islamo-crazies who go around killing people. Still, he said there’s no evidence that it was us and that the Brits hate their government, panic over.
Imagine this - March 22, 2024, our Taoiseach puts out a nightly video and says “Sure they bombed us earlier so, what do they expect.” A couple of his colleagues say the same thing. They even say it’s a false flag, that the Brits did it to get sympathy. Johnson just won another election to remain PM so who knows, they say. It’s unlikely it’s a false flag, personally speaking.
Imagine this - March 23, 2024, Jaysus it’s worse it’s getting. Over a hundred dead, kids and families just on a Friday night out. Now, I didn’t know this but I checked and it’s true, the Yanks warned their people in Britain that there would be a terror attack within 48 hours of March 7. They didn’t give specifics and now they’re saying they didn’t know what the warning was about. Wait, it’s now everywhere that this is an offshoot of those ghouls ISIS who did it. So, maybe it was them. I wonder what Johnson will have to say. Oh, wait, loads of news now.
Imagine this - March 23, 2024, reports of the killers being caught as they’re boarding a fast ferry to Dublin. What the feck! No, wait, to Iceland, they were headed to Iceland, one of the only countries in Europe who are still friendly with the Brits. Well, apart from India, Russia, Pakistan, China, Africa, the Middle East, Sri Lanka, ok, I don’t even want to go to Latin America. So what is going on. I’ll wait to see because Britain have enough weapons to sink the island.
Imagine this - They’ve caught 4 lads from a terrorist group that, oh Jaysus, have been reported as having a training base here - by our own newspapers no less. And they were on the way to Ireland. They were boarding the Swift high speed catamaran when they were grabbed. So they were coming back, or at least running here. Washington is loyal, they say it’s nothing to do with us, that the Brits are just “at it” again. I’m turning off social media, oh, wait. Johnson is on air.
Imagine this - Boris Johnson tells the world he knows who did it and that the Irish were involved with Yankee help. Fuck, sorry, I have to curse. This stuff just got real. I see US media laugh it off. Our own Taoiseach goes on social media and says stupid shit. He’s going to get us bombed to bits. He tells the world that it goes to show that if British soldiers weren’t up in Ulster, the part we got back after devolution, fighting us that no terrorists would get through to the capital. He is such a clown. He only had to be statesmanlike and say - “We grieve for those who lost loved ones, family, friends. We go through it every day with the Brits bombing us, so we know how it feels.” I mean, like that he has the higher ground and that cash America is supposed to send us would come quicker.
Imagine this - March 24, 2024, all these talking heads saying we don’t do terrorism. HAHAHAHA Sorry, I mean, it didn’t just start in 2014. But we do it. We were attacking Holyhead in Wales with British dissidents (mercenaries and neonazis) who came over to our side. We were attacking there only last week. Plus we’ve been bombing Antrim and the parts of Derry, Armagh and Down we don’t control for years. It’s a bit awkward now. I have family in Britain and however strained the relationship was before, now it’s gone. I email my 2nd cousin, he doesn’t reply. I guess that’s better than telling me to fuck off. This is a total mess. The Brits keep blaming us. I mean we tried to blow up the bridge from Torr Head to the Mull of Kintyre a few times, even killing civilians in the process. Legally, it’s terrorism. But since that part of Antrim broke off from us fully in 2014 they’ve been supplying them with all sorts. It’s fair game.
Imagine this - March 26, 2024, our idiot of a Taoiseach has just fired the head of the Defence Council out of nowhere. One of his loyalists, and a man whose mouth was cashing more cheques than his brain could cover, is gone and replaced by our Foreign Intelligence head. I read US and European papers, nothing, thank God! Imagine if anyone with a brain looked at what happened on Friday and then saw us fire our Defence Council chief, they’d ask questions at least. Luckily CNN and the others remain silent. The Brits are screeching, but since BBC and their other state-controlled media from the island is blocked in the EU, US, Canada, nobody knows. Well, odd thing, we have it here. They still make great tv shows, their news is pathetic “Ra, Ra Britain" and that, though they’re laying out the evidence pretty clearly.
Now imagine Ireland is Ukraine. A small country in an unwinnable war with a larger neighbour. A country with a history and present of using terror tactics on neighbouring nations. Imagine a terror event happened in the larger neighbour and the terrorists were fleeing into Ukraine. Terrorists whose group have had a base in Ukraine for years. Terrorists from a nation where the Ukrainian Embassy was actively recruiting fighters to come defend the country against Russia. Surely Washington, London, Brussels and all the media mouthpieces would want to have a look under the bonnet before they just buy whatever ould clapped out nonsense of a banger was pushed in front of them.
Or does it matter? Not many Russian flags in Facebook bios last weekend.